In the course of a year I worked full time, gave up a career, became a stay at home wife, and a blogger. I moved away to Texas with my husband and only ten months later moved back to Louisiana. It's basically been of blur of life events that happened in a blink of an eye. But in that year of change, I learned a whole lot about myself and others. I learned that being a stay at home wife last year brought me so much joy in ways I never would have imagined. I was healthier, happier, and a wife that could love her husband in new ways and in return I felt his love grow even deeper.
What I struggled with, and still struggle with is that when did it become not okay to be a stay at home wife or mom? It's okay to be a successful career woman, but for some reason, I am guessing because women have worked so hard to get to the top that I find myself in a world of "you stay at home?" and "what do you do all day?" with a certain look of disapproval or misunderstanding.
The fact of the matter is, I think it's amazing that women are running major companies and doing whatever it is that makes them happy. We live in a world of more education, more money, more, more, more. And frankly what Canean and I both learned over the past year is that all that "stuff" doesn't matter if you aren't happy. It simply isn't important. I think it's just as amazing that there are moms and wives who stay at home and most of the time their works go unnoticed by the rest of the world and yet they continue to do them everyday.
For me (call me old school), but it makes me happy to be at home taking care of things on this end, cooking a delicious meal for my husband, keeping a clean house and making sure that my marriage is a focus on a daily basis...that brings me contentment.
And you know what? It may not for you and that is okay. That's my point here.
Since moving back to Louisiana, I have started to work part time, and still feel like I get the stink eye from other women when they find out that I don't work full-time and have no plans on doing so. AND then I really throw them for a loop when they find out we don't have any kids and have no immediate plans on doing so. Like it might have been okay if I had three kids to take care of at home, but since we don't it's less okay.
The past month or so I have really been having an internal battle with myself about this very subject and ended up reading Proverbs 31: 10-29. In these verses I found a little peace about it all, and it has helped me to not be concerned with what other people might think of the decisions that Canean and I make for our marriage.
For us, it was worth the monetary sacrifice to have me be at home more. That's our decision obviously, and doesn't have to be yours. And that is perfectly fine.
Next time that you meet a woman who stays at home, try to give her just as much approval as you would for someone who just graduated with her 5th degree with a starting salary of $150,000. Just think...if the thought of staying home sounds like a horrible idea to you, then maybe you can find some appreciation for the fact that she does it on a daily basis.
In a world so focused on who can out do who, it's nice when you can find contentment in your own life and appreciation for the woman standing next to you, leaving judgment out of the picture.
I'm thinking we would all be a lot happier...
Photo Credit: Natalie Mancuso Photography